TIME TO MAN THE F*** UP!!!!!! End the "college/lets have fun/i'm gonna do me etc' shit! WOMEN NEED MEN! Not us posing as men. Its not what they can do for us; its what we can do for them and then you'll notice change. NO MANIPULATION! Just transform from BOY TO MAN! Its not just about ourselves. WHAT CAN YOU DO to make her happy? LEAD BY EXAMPLE AND if she doesn't follow suit then maybe she isn't the one for you! Its not what your mate can do for you; its what can you do for your mate; SET A FIX! See what you need and be the person you want them to be but do not expect them not to be them TRICKY I KNOW!
Fellas I get it sometimes you feel overwhelmed to the point of breaking down. Sometimes you feel like giving up. And when you do, remember, it's okay to cry and to open up to others and when that's done, look in the mirror and smile. There's a reason you held on for so long with whatever struggles you went through whether if that was dealing with finances, relationships, your children or career. You can not give up! You are the FRANCHISE PLAYER! You are the one to take the clutch shot at the end of the game, you are the one who your family turns to when times get rough, you are the man who will take the responsibility even if you fail. We have to become better leaders starting with our homes.
Ok Steve what makes a great leader? Ask most people and they'll say "intelligence" for starters. Vision, drive, being able to communicate well, blah, blah, blah. Those are the crap answers you'll get from other authors who want to sugarcoat the truth and who orate from behind their oak desks. They're forgetting the big stuff; the stuff you don't learn sitting down while taking lessons.
What these "gurus" don't tell you is that the real traits that make a leader great are not the idealistic mantras or the status quo of “what a man should do”. It's the stuff between the lines that only mistakes and experience can teach you. Sure, every leader needs brains (or in the case of certain chief executives, people around him with brains) and vision, but that's only to get the job. Staying at the top involves possessing completely different skills. Not every clown has them. What are they?
1- Being respected -- You have earn your families respect and the only way you can do that is being honest at all times, you have to have the willingness to make mistakes and admit when you are wrong.
2- Being street smart -- It's self-explanatory, if I need to explain it, you'll never have it.
3- Being feared --No not in the way where you are abusive or to the point where your wife or kids are afraid to speak to you but make sure they know who is boss by disciplining your kids effectively so their minor mistakes become extinct. With your wife well thats a battle we will never win so just accept it!
4- Getting your fingernails dirty -- Leading by example. If you tell your kids don't leave dishes in the sink you don't either, if you tell your wife to stop leaving the room a mess you don't either! Etc etc lead by example and not by just words
5. Leading spiritually. How can and should you spiritually lead your wife and children? To accomplish this task you first must be a spiritually committed man. It is obvious that you cannot lead anyone anywhere if you have not been there first. This is what Jesus meant when he reproved the Pharisees saying: “They are blind leaders of the blind. And if the blind leads the blind, both will fall into a ditch” (Matt. 15:14).
One of the greatest problems facing many families today is the lack of leadership by the husband. Some husbands don’t realize that God has ordained them for this role, while others simply don’t understand how they should lead; still others simply refuse to lead. Most of the men that I counsel or speak to do not realize that many of the serious problems that are occurring in their homes directly result from their failure to lead. It is clear that the lack of the husband’s leadership in his home will definitely create a chain reaction of marital, financial, and parenting problems.
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