The Fish & Grits Diary of a former Bitter Black Man

Last week we discussed can a healthy relationship last without sex.....according to the readers, listeners, followers etc this is an extreme lie! It cant be done....I agree....I stated in my last blog post "These Are The Times": " while sex is an important part of a relationship, in the end it's how you navigate the bad times that really define how strong your relationship is. Too many people are willing to bail when bad times happen because it's easy to fix with a legal procedure and piece of paper, and sex is readily available elsewhere." I also stated that their is nothing wrong with holding out on sex. But as soon as you give yourselves towards each other why stop completely?  Today via social networks I asked a few questions including If first date sex is acceptable and I asked why or why not....generally I know TONS OF PEOPLE who want it but are either ashamed to admit it or keep their secret inner freak on the low. Some put it down as if the top ...

These are the times we all wish for  The moment when less means so much more  We don't have to do a thing at all  We can take our time and talk  And this is the way things need to be  No pressure from you and none from me  Just let the mood set the moment off  We can make love or not at all  Dru Hill- These Are the Times Q of the Moment: Can couples have a healthy relationship without having sex?  There are many opinions on this, but I'll throw my thoughts  in because I think I've got enough years and experience in to give some insight on this one.   I've been been having sex since May 16th 1999  One long-term relationship I have had I was in I thought was the best I had ever been in. Sex was incredible, and we had everything in common. In the end however, when times got a bit rough for us, she bailed, and it tore me apart. After thinking long and hard, I realized that the sex was the only real base of our r...

Last winter I was sleeping on my brothers couch feeling sorry for myself because I couldnt secure a job for shit!  SO eventually I was blessed with a job and a new place to live. But through that time I was homeless I gained tons of weight son! I looked in the mirror and said ewwwwww.....most of you know me and know I am a conceited bastard who is full of himself in more ways than one. I will compliment myself for complimenting myself conceited its that fucking serious. In high school I couldnt gain more than 175 lbs after college I was 185lb....during my singing group days 190 tops well cut and skinny.....went through a few breakups and depression and 40 lbs later I look like someones uncle who is leaving his name on the cereal while living with his mother. I was losing sleep, losing my mind and also respect from myself. My good friends who throw jabs and I would pretend as if it were nothing but deep inside I hated myself....I hated not being able to take my shirt off in front of...

They say they out for dead presidents, never respected First of all, Ben Franklin was never elected That means him and Big Bills have never connected They just say it cause they think it sounds clever on records Secondly, God's first should never be second And if you living wrong, money can never correct it ~Fabolous "Wolves In Sheep's Clothing"  Our generation is in a state of emergency and we DONT REALIZE IT! We lack the communication skills of adults, we're selfish, we're arrogant with what we have and what we think we have and we are just so evil towards each other...WE ARE KILLING OURSELVES off slowly...imagine a lobster being cooked without placing it in boil water immediately or going to purchase the weapon of choice your murderer will use. Its deeper than we see it. We are putting up a front as if WE are ok. That may be true as an individual you may be "ok" but I have asked over and over again WTF ARE YOU WILLING TO SACRIFICE TO BE GR...

You're not my daddy You're my man I think it's time you understand So just make me happy if you can, oh I'm not your mama I'm your girl And I am the lady in your world And loving each other's how we work, oh Kelly Price ft Mint Condition It’s natural when you have a disagreement with someone or they or you do something that gets misinterpreted to explain and discuss what has happened. You can then move to a resolution and go forward if both parties  empathize  with one another’s perspective and the incident  isn't  symbolic of inherent disrespect. A relationship where you share similar values means it won’t be like one of you is speaking Spanish and the other is speaking Creole but both assuming you’re speaking the same language. In a relationship, you have the past as an indicator of the ‘misunderstanding’. In a  commitment, you have to question how much you need to really be explaining when  you've  been together for a hot minute. Whe...